If I lost all soul,
I lost all character,
lost all self,
you'd still
love me
more powerful than
my soul,
my character,
myself.

money loan;
burn your lungs;
lose all thought;
never sleep;
money debt;
never eat;
excessively fuck;
over-eat;
over-think;
disease;
paranoia;
solitude;
stress;
loss;
college.

Once again it happens,
the streak continues
and will never stop.
How am I supposed
to be okay with
death
when I am not
even okay
with life?

I can see my future,
when I look into the blue
of the sky.
I can see my future,
in he greenest forest far away.
I can see it more,
than when I look
into
the mirror.

You've got the fire,
I just want to burn,
You've got the fire,
just watch me burn.

When I wear black
YOU'RE GOING TO ADMIRE THIS.
When I wear black
YOU'RE GOING TO ADMIRE THIS.
When I wear black
YOU'RE GOING TO LOSE YOUR skin.
When I wear black
IT'LL BE THE NEW SIN.
Get your own
fucking
mind.
Lose your own
fucking
mind.
Fuck your own
fucking
mind.

I love you more,
than I would
ever love myself.
I wish I could
myself like
I love
you.

I will wait
even if
time
also won't
let me.

There are some
who believe my greatest weakness
is that I am too nice
and for those who do
I bid FUCK YOU.

I've been hungry for
too long,
thanks for all
the food.
I starve myself
lonely,
And
I eat myself
company.

I'll be your leech
and you'll be mine,
no sucking of blood
just sticking
together
for all of
our time.

As long as
we are
naive,
everything
will
be okay;
Eternity will
be
our lives.

My faith for you
will never
end,
such as one's
faith
blinded heavy
in God.

Your transparency
is illuminating,
lighting the
earth
as we
know it.
It ain't the
sun,
no it ain't
even the moon;
it's all the shit
you breed,
the lights
you feed
up in the sky.
If you're
foolish
enough to hide,
we'll just bury
you in
the
tomb.
Illuminate us
in death,
as if there's a
difference now.

I built a
fire,
though the
flame
has not yet
matured.
This is
my
thorn.

I do not
have
a life,
this is where
I come
to lose
it.

Bigger than
the moon,
And it's
all for
you.
Hotter than
the Sun,
you will
always
be my Dawn.

I can still feel you,
pulsing in and out.
The rush of blood,
back and forth,
in and out.
I will never
stop.

My thoughts will wander
they'll always come home,
they'll always come back to
you.
Inside you,
the eyes that see right
through me.

Another day,
Another gone.
This time,
I know you.
This time,
it is me saying:
"Good-bye".
It has sunk in,
like the death
of ships
being swallowed up
by seas of
ocean.
And just like in
the songs you've heard;
this is where I breakdown..

You're not the first person
I've lied to,
and you won't be the last.
It's just not for me;
I was truly
born free.

I blink and it's already 2AM,
another night of lethargic
fornication with ideas.
Amusingly,
they last longer
than you.

Sensation of anticipation,
you can hear the quietness of the
piano slowly building up.
The bass begins, resembling blood being pumped
to all the corners of my being.
The scraping sound of the guitar bares
the screams of silenced souls --
misplaced notes are the puzzles
that are not finished,
the spontaneity
clashes with my knowledge,
melodies are the masks
I form to fit the molds
you create.
And fades
like my death forgotten.

I used to wear my luck around my wrists
and around my neck.
Hoping for something good would
happen,
slaving all this time to realize
you cannot wait,
you cannot hope,
you must do good
in order to receive it.
Now I wear my luck within
the hearts of
those I meet.
I wish you luck,
I give you luck;
happiness for eternity.

I used to stay up for hours
in the quiet of the night,
now I stay up for hours in my dreams
searching for something better but
only stumbling upon blue-skies.

You cry lots of tears,
but there's still a drought.
I will never drink from your water.

We are the rocks buried in mud,
God is the farmer turning us up
as he plants his crops for the summer.
All is random, spontaneous and unbiased,
fate can coincidentally be predictable.

~Headache?~

I have a headache,
but it doesn't seem like a normal one.
It feels like thousands of voltages of electricity
passing through,
destroying everything inside.
Except for my ability to think,
to write,
to see,/
and to feel.
Is this what hell is?
Is this my death?
The constant beeping of the furnace
is it real or not?
My mind keeps the sound beeping continuously,
and now I never know if it's real
or my insanity peeping out the window.
My mind is hurting so bad,
like a war is waging on inside,
every thought thought is killing
my brain.
But
I think I'll just vomit
for now.

~I'm sleepy~

When your lungs are burning from
your arguments and rivers of tears going down your
face are slowly building up into solids that
look like dry vertical lines which
are mistaken for wrinkles,
You think 'damn I need to talk to someone.
Anyone.'
Maybe even a cigarette.'
But that isn't good for you.
People cannot handle it.
Then you get your shit together
and think.
Why the hell were we fighting?
Only you don't ask out loud,
it just sizzles and burns into
your skin
slowly.
Just like all the words, the fucks
the shits, the assholes being thrown around.
The disappointments spewing like hot lava from your erupting lips
that are going faster than a sewing machine
and then you break-
down.
With sighs of gasping breathes and
tears.
No one comes out victorious in arguments,
those are battles that should never be fought.
They always say no one is on a winning side in war.
Only our wars feel much more personal.
It's never about winning or losing now.
We come out of it barely breathing or thinking straight and
leave with some wounds that will definitely turn into scars.
Apologies can only go so far and even if the point has been
received it's too late to erase all the destruction that has been caused.
No one wins in wars,
no one wins in arguments.
Not that anyone cares anymore.

~Not Pleasing To Hear~

You cannot please everyone,
unless you're willing to go down
on them.

~Red~

It's funny how the nail polish I spilled
onto my bed sheets
is the same colour as my lipstick.
The red stain exists in many lives;
between legs,
on lips,
on nails,
in bodies
in and out of hearts.
Life is black, white and red, but
Only if you want it to be.

~Morning Traffic~

My mind is traffic
based on people's curiosity
to stare at accidents.
Reality is on the side
of the road like roadkill.
Soon my mind will
end up that way.
Signs of warning
telling me what's up ahead,
but I still don't know,
the signs are too
far away.
Even if I did know
I'd still be
lost.

~Pondering The Forgots~

Sometimes when I hear your name,
I wonder if you miss me.
Miss the times of the person I thought
I used to be.
Just a clear void walking straight lines
but fun nonetheless.
I became good at that,
before you came you should've witnessed the mess.
It was starting to happen again,
you left before you could help me stop it.
I tried to get you,
but you told me it was too much, fuck it.
You never said it with your lips,
but your lack of presence was
yelling.
Louder than the storm's raging
thunder,
lightening hit,
it's all I felt then.
Now I don't even do the things,
that I did before.
It's okay now they're only reminders,
things I've let falling to the floor.
I wonder if hearing my name manifests
into thoughts,
like when I hear yours
I ponder about the forgots.

~Oh, Fuck Off Already~

Forgive me I cannot remember your name,
my memory perishes faster than the nails
on my fingers.
You do look familiar, did we meet in school?
You treat me as if we shared happiness
many times before,
however I feel misery was often shared more.
Disagreeing out of politeness and quick to point
the gun,
I have a feeling this is why I made myself forget
you
and your denial-like fun.

~I prefer my own company~

It's heavier than a bag full of bricks,
but I don't know why you'd carry that around,
that ain't common sense.
I carry it around,
I threw my sense in the bag too.
I won't push you away,
but I won't let you take another step.
I don't throw out any threats,
if I did they wouldn't be empty.
I know I told you to come over,
but I don't want you any closer.
If I did it would ruin me,
if I didn't it would ruin you.
Bare with the confusion,
I'll set you straight
far the fuck away from me.
I was only trying to be polite.
You ain't my friend,
No.
You ain't even my lover.

~My Future~

I'm choosing to stay down,
down to the earth
In the soil where I shall
become soil.
I'll spend my days
trying to form into
rock,
and never succeeding.
It's easy to fall apart
and it's hard to
become
whole.
Whole is where the heart is,
Hole is where the heart is.

~It's Fucking Complicated~
Does the past forgive the present,
to make it easier to forget?
In time the present becomes the past,
and we no longer cannot forget.

~111~

I can never sleep the night before something,
but tomorrow is just like any other day.
My hair curled up between my pillow and neck,
window blinds open, eyes closed.
Comfort is there in the smell of home,
tomorrow is just like any other day,
yet I cannot sleep.
The moon checks in to see if I am really asleep,
he finds peace within our dreaming minds
as we find peace within his glowing surface.
I pretend I am so he will pass on and gaze into the sky
quietly and peeks in on someone else.
Slowly my lids grow heavier than guilt,
just like any other day, tomorrow is almost
here
And
Now I am fast asleep.

~Nonsense at 1am~

All the words I see keep shifting;
becoming blurred,
like the truth once told
that are lies.
Nothing is one entity,
there are many sides to it's shape.
Echoing in minds are instincts,
not words, not sounds.
Thoughts becoming clustered,
multiplying faster than cells.
My prison holds my happiness,
here are the keys for
the lock.

~Death~

The worst feeling you experience is not Death.
It is Death's invitation into your home;
sitting at the dinner table amongst your family,
observing the love being passed from plate to plate,
saying a prayer that only God could hear, but he can't.
His invitation will leave you with an impression that
will not last for days, but for weeks and even years.
He tells us we are in the rain, we are in the soil,
we grow into trees and breathe life into the world.
Then he leaves.
It is knowing who Death is,
that scares us the most.
We know of Death's capabilities,
but we do not know when he will be capable.
The worst feeling is Death inviting someone you love
to Death's home and never returning.
We know who took them, we know where they are
but we cannot get them,
they are gone forever.

~I Should Write An Angry Poem But Maybe Next Time~

I have t'bite down on my lip
to stop all the suppressed memories,
My short and long term aren't great
but it sure brings up shit
just to get to me.
My eyes burst into veins to avoid all the tears,
that's what happens when you pay
for thinking some things were all real.
I could touch it,
I could smell it,
I could hug it with all my love,
and no matter what I did
they were all just hazy thoughts.
I would talk and they would listen,
Seemingly feeling what I would feel.
I didn't realize how much of a fucking
asshole,
A fucking asshole could really be.

SN: God, it really feels good to remove the knife you stabbed me with not too long ago, maybe I'll return the favour. Wait... I believe in karma.

~Sailing Away~

I'll slave away the day
I'll slave away the night
and in the morning
I'll eat away my appetite
with old cigarettes
and stale coffee
and my nails,
a true habit's feast.
Tonight they'll sleep
but I'll keep slaving
away.

More poems!!!!!!!!! Too optimistic for a poet?

~Meeting~
When I manifest upon my thoughts
and the path is flooded,
soaked,
drenched in every moment
we have ever met,
I regret
not our meeting
but the lack there of.
I cannot show you
yet,
I am not ready,
I cannot show you
yet.

~Strangers with Eyes~

Stories hidden behind
the eyes of
Strangers,
are those that will slice
off your ears
and pin them down to walls.
You will not feel any pain but
you will only feel
the words being calculatedly
articulated; the lisp of tongue;
the spray of saliva,
and joy in your heart,
pounding to the beat of syllables
of the strangers willingness
to share
a piece of their unfinished puzzle.

~The Bookstore~
Today I bought books,
with my own money.
They tell of life with
words that are aged and rubbed away
from waves of experience
and wisdom.
Oceans and oceans
of hurt.
I will read but I will
never learn what I must do to never
become that,
I want to become
that.

~Lipstick~
Just like red lipstick on my lips,
you aren't going to stay,
you'll just leave a
stain.

Good-morning worldlings...poetry for breakfast!


~Thoughts again~

Cancer..
What won't give me cancer?
not even love.
not even you.
not even the air I breathe,
it's all gone to shit.
I realize that now,
I've got a tumor the size of my heart,
Isn't that ironic?
Endless amounts of cancer
but I'll still have that cigarette.



~Black~

All your goodness has gone to waste,
has gone to waste.
All your goodness has gone to waste,
has gone to waste
because of one mistake.
All your goodness has gone to waste,
has gone to waste.
All your goodness has gone to waste,
because of one fatal mistake.



~FYA~

The only thing that isn't falling apart
isn't my knee,
it's my heart.
With everyone I meet
my heart goes with them
and passes onto those they meet.
Where I cannot go,
I go with them;
forever traveling the world,
while remaining here
in physical pain
but emotional joy,.
My heart will travel worlds,
will live with everyone,
all while resting in my
new-found wisdom.

Hey world, it's just another page in my story;

~Should've Left a Long Time Ago~
I wasn't accepting of your flaws
I was in denial.
You had no flaws to me
perfection in it's truest form.
I was in denial,
no flaws.
That's my flaw,
You made me see mine,
Let me show you yours.
Your complexion isn't so clear,
There's smoke blowing into your direction
Your God has the cigarette.
You make it all my fault,
It's all my flaws but
Your God is smoking the cigarette.

~Comfort Of Company~


My comfy bed doesn't feel so comfy
anymore.
I just lie there trying to feel it's comfort again
and it's gone.
It probably left and got scared;
things tend to do that when things
get hard.
I understand.
You just want your space,
but I don't want mine,
I want my comfort back.

~I don't Know~

You are
Something I don't give a fuck about.
My eyes are tearing
'cause the smoke from my cigarettes
is fading into my eyes.

Smokey eyes.

Your selfish bullshit is on my book shelf
in my mind somewhere.
It's disorganized;
outdated.
I'll throw it all out after you hit me
with a bomb that you'll drop
when you are not satisfied.

It doesn't matter if I am,
and I am,
I'm satisfied
because you are not.
Maybe invest in a dick.

Hello world, guess what I have for you? poems..

~The friend you go out of your way not to notice~

The friend you go out of your way not to notice.
It's painfully obvious,
the person can see it.
perhaps even smell it.
They just walk on by pretending not to see you,
but they see you,
they're looking right through you.
Like a siren in the night,
it'll scare you,
convincing yourself it's not
because of you.
But it is,
and you still don't run.

~Keys and Locks~

We prefer the key than
the lock.
I write for minds,
not for discussions.
I just hear the attraction of flies
to their mother light
I just sit as always,
but now I'm waiting
for it to come to me.
I wait as if I'm waiting for
the next season to come,
but it won't be for awhile,
No, it won't be for awhile.


~The Truth Is A Naked Gun~

I can see the stars, you can see the sky.
crying in a jar..
subtly.
The moon has perfect timing,
I see it over the field.
I choose to be alone.
The truth is a naked gun.

~Hibernation and Sandcastles

I sit in my washroom,
smoking cigarettes,
drinking saliva
I know who I am,
You know who I am,
Deeper than the roots of rock
longer than any strand of hair,
I'll know you for awhile
I hope I don't fall
to sleep.
I won't hibernate
in winter
I won't build sandcastles
in summer
My fingers will develop
the bad habit.

Hello world, poems once again...

~Inspiration~

Like a sad and pathetic tapeworm looking for fat in a 90 pound anorexic
there is no treasure beneath the X
and it's already too late
like trying to prevent cancer from growing within my body
I'm smoking cigarettes,
it's either me or you babe,
I'm betting on me,
but I know I'm going to lose

Hello world whom is not there, here is another poem :)

~Fair~
It's things like that, that make me know
That even the fairest people aren't fair.
You come across these people and believe and think
You know what you see, but you haven't seen what I've seen.
The most unfair people are those who make you believe they are fair
because they make themselves believe they are fair.
The circle of denial is the most powerful tool in our possession,
To use them subconsciously is even more powerful.
I sit here typing away about the things that make me know
That even the fairest people aren't fair.
I see you now,
I see you as denial.

and another...

~Needles in Knees~

needles in knees,
needles in knees,
needles in knees.

They don't hurt.
My knee hurts, but not from the needles.
I walk around with a cane,
This is a sign of shit to come.
Putting needles in my knees will stop that shit from coming.
I fucking hate acupuncture.
But my energy is low,
and I have to drink a diarrhea-like potion
to put my energy in motion.

Every Saturday it will be the same,
needles in knees,
cane in hand,
love in the trash can.

Who do I thank for this?
God?
Thanks, man.


and another...

~I have no title~

My teeth hurt more than you think
Watching articulated actions slowly decay than shrink
Becoming the darkest shades of gray in sorrow
Starring at the faltering thoughts in the past of tomorrow's
We paint the walls white with our forgerical optimism
Thinking they won't ever become the colour of
our deep, penetrative pessimism.

Hello world, I have 2 poems to share with you today. They are small, but I still love them..

~Charcoal Portrait~

Like a charcoal portrait,
the closer you are
the more you see the black smudges
on the canvas; it becomes blurred.
Stand far away and it looks
flawless;
A black and white photograph.
Now you know me.


~The Truth's a Bitch~

I am not witty when it comes to honesty,
when it comes to how I truly feel
To articulate the unintelligible.
The sound, the energy,
The feeling.
To describe with no fear,
To give an opinion with no taint,
No tarnish; clean.

The Shower

Hello world...

~The Shower~

The little cut from your razor while shaving
it just won't clot,
it keeps bleeding,
dripping,
bathing on your skin.
Till you wipe the blood away
and it continues the same path.
Paving it deeper,
wider,
darker.
It just won't clot,
it's refusal is a nuisances.
I respect it's consistency,
it's perseverance.
You'll never be this good.

My first entry

Hello world, this is the first poem I will show you that I wrote..

~Legal Rape~

When you wake up everyday not giving shit
You've got life by the cunt.
When you wake up everyday and you can face that rusting mirror,
You've got life by the dick.
When you wake up everyday and can walk outside of your room,
You've got life by the asshole.
When you wake up everyday and walk into a crowd care-free,
You've got life by the throat.
When you wake up everyday and that one motherfucker puts you down and you just laugh,
You've got life by the hair
When you wake up everyday and realize that life
had you by the cunt
by the dick,
by the asshole,
by the throat,
by the hair,
You're raping life one day at a time.
And it's legal.